I ve been kidnapped by the pirates of love and, baby, this time the ransom is you
I want to be closer to you, girl, than some form of parasitic worm
My love for you girl, will last much longer than the life of this puppy I just bought
It ll even outlast the radiation at Chernobyl
The cancer of your beauty has metastasized its way to my heart
And the chemo of bitter words won t kill it
If you told me to leave you, my heart would drop lower than the ThAC0 of a high level fighter in D&D
Cause you are my sputnik, spurning the politicians of America against the red menace
I d welcome the immune problems that we d both be sure to get
If we sewed our veins together so we could share more than words
Even if a kill-bot commanded me too, I wouldn t consume your sweet flesh
To gain the energy needed to work in the Lunar Trilithium mines


You are so sweet to me, girl, I think I have adult diabetes
and your love s the insulin I need to balance out my blood-sugar levels
If Cannibals had us, Id tell them to eat my heart first, so they d be filled with love for you
Id you wanted I d destroy an endangered species for you
Even if you didn t say so, I could tell by the look in your eyes
If zombies surrounded us and I joined their undead legion
Id try not to attack you but I inevitably would, cause Im so hungry for brains
What I m trying to say, is that I love you